What's In a Name?

II would like to first talk about how boring I find my name. Kayla is very common for girls in my age demographic. I wanted to feel special about my name and the cool meaning behind it but it simply means pure. My last name I like way more because it has a more complex story. It's Scottish and an occupational last name. Like my first name, my last name doesn't define me either. I'm not Scottish and my ancestors probably weren't tailors. I does provide a better understanding of my identity. My great-grandmother, who is still alive today was a sharecropper and lived, interacted, and experienced the testament s of slavery through her grandparents. Their owners were of Scottish descent, which was the majority of Halifax county. My last name depicts the complexities of human interaction and development over time.

I feel like I'm two completely different people depending on which parent's house I'm living in. Because I spend less time with my mother, I feel she tries to make up for the lost time and almost feels guilty for seeing us less than when her and my dad were married. I think my dad feels guilty too because he works a ton. He tends to get more stressed so I get more stressed as a result and become distant. My mother on the other hand, tries to make the environment seem comfortable and relaxed. I thrive in her home. I seem to get more work done and I feel I can live more authentically. Because my dad is so stressed out I don't want to branch out and voice my concerns which would create a more stressful environment. I'm extremely reserved at my dad's and almost pensive and lofty at my mother's. My role as a daughter, to love my family and help is the smart in both households, they're just executed differently to accomadate the situational aspects.